While they're sleeping...

Miraculously both of my boys are napping right now! To nap or not to nap? That is the ever-looming question. To nap would mean to RELAX. However, it would also mean risking being awoken (is that the right word?) before I'm completely rested. If you know me, I do NOT function well when I'm tired (especially when I'm TRYING to nap).  I am CRAAAAAANNKY. I hate to admit it. But it is what it is.

At this point in the day (2ish), I am too tired to really accomplish anything that should be done while the boys are asleep. It's "me" time... but whatever I choose to do, I'm pretty much half awake. Not the sharpest time of day for me. Maybe that's why this post reads so unclearly. I just reread it and it sounds like I'm on narcotics... again.

I'm not. I promise.

I just felt like writing. It's still the beginning of 2009 and I have been doing some self evaluating. Okay, A LOT of pretty deep self evaluation has been going in the past week and a half (since I was diagnosed with Mastitis. Man that really knocked me on my!). I've learned new things about myself. My husband. Our relationship. Man, I love that guy. He is so perfect for me.

But back to me. I've been studying Louise L. Hay's "Heal Your Body" which is all about metaphysics. How your emotional state effects your physical, and how to over come barriers and thought patterns that are causing physical symptoms. I am fascinated. I've also gotten to the point that I can admit that I have issues. I am recognizing them so I can over come them. To others my "issues" may seem minor. But who's comparing? I have decided that I need to let go of the "baggage" in my life no matter how HUGE or small. I don't need it!  I can't put into words the things I have discovered, but it all leads to self-awareness, and choices. I know this may sound "hippie"ish but whatever. I want peace in my life. "In-in-inner peace" (- Master Shifu, Kung Fu Panda). The Gospel of Jesus Christ has always brought peace into my life through knowledge and choices. So now, I am just digging deeper into myself, overcoming insecurities, childhood behaviors and issues, changing my thought patterns so I break life-long "habits" that are holding me back... all that good stuff. Really, it is good. I feel myself growing and maturing which equals a better wife and mother which equals a happier home! No matter where that home is.

Yes, our move to Utah will be a good one. It is a decision Cameron and I made together and we both WANT. Sure, it's no fun to move (again.) but we press forward with faith. I will admit, I was very OK with the idea of living here in Las Vegas. Such great people and the weather! OH THE WEATHER! I LOVE it! Well, right now I do. It's PERFECT. I hear its dreadful hot in the summer though. Oh well. Into the snow we go!

I'm giving my blog a couple more days before I make it private. I'm letting the announcement sit for a while so (hopefully) all who want to make the switch over with us (me), can.

I might make an attempt to get a few minutes of shut-eye before my little princes wake. Until next time!